You and your bride just got back from your honeymoon, and things are going perfectly. Over coffee in the morning, one of you mention that you’d like to work on your budget together. The other person stops in mid coffee sip and looks at you as if you have a third eye. A what? You repeat that you’d like to talk about a budget so you can plan for tithing, saving, spending and all the things that come with life.
What both just realized is that someone grew up without a budget and one did. That could be a very delicate conversation to have. I grew up in a family that was check-to-check. I had to save money just to pay my car insurance and have gas money. Back then it was a 5.00 gas stop. Filling up my car with gas was for rich folk. My wife grew up with uncashed checks on her dresser from her job in high school and family. That didn’t compute in my world. There was no dust on my money from sitting still.
Money is one of those things that people struggle with most of their lives. Money makes you say strange things like, “I deserve this” or “I need this.” People shop out of depression and insecurity more than you think. I had a friend who I worked with who was having car issues, money issues, family issues on top of a 90-minute one-way drive to work. He came in, and I asked him how his weekend was. He said he and his wife purchased a whole living room set. I asked if they had been shopping long for that. He said, “no, they were feeling depressed over the weekend, and this was supposed to make them feel better.” Notice he said, “was supposed to…”.
If managing money is tricky, talking about the topic is even harder. You may want to open the discussion in prayer and set the bar at, “Lord this is your money…not ours.” It’s important to understand that so you can know that you are trying to be good stewards with God’s money. That alone should change the way each of you saves and spends money.
Do you and your spouse approach money the same way?
What do you do to put God first in your finances?
Spend time in prayer, time in study and time discussing your finances but discuss out of love and not out of selfishness.
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